Reach the sky;

Thursday, October 2, 2008

I seem to be blogging more often now even though it's still technically the exam period. But I think 70% of me has decided what comes, comes. Sometimes I find my pathetically short attention span problematic. No wait, make that all the time.

Physics test, was... rubbish. I'm sorry Brander Na! My bugging you for like half the day yesterday has all come to waste! Because 90% of what I asked you, and studied(sort of) did NOT come out. So I'm pretty much I can kick the whole idea of reaching the goal they've, and myself, have decided upon.

But of course, it's just going downhill tomorrow. Considering it's the dreaded SS paper. Ah... my arch nemesis, whom I can't seem to EVER pass against. Even if I get by some divine stroke of (luck? Maybe not) something, an a1 in geog, my beloved is just gonna' tear the lovely dream into shreds, shambles, you get the idea.

So wait, why am I NOT studying SS right now? Well, quite simply, I don't have all that much of motivation. Ironically, what I was so caught up on a couple of weeks, has taken a back seat, to allow front row box office thrones to(my delight actually) knowing more about God. Yay!

There are a million things that I still have to fix in my life(not kidding) considering I'm probably the rashest, most impulsive, violent, proud, arrogant baboon in the whole entire world. Not very much helped by the fact that I'll shoot my mouth off if pushed to that point(which doesn't take long actually). But I pray that in the days to come something/someone will just waltz up to me and knock some sense into my thick skull.

List of things to drill into my head:
1. It's not about me.
2. I'm not an accident. (Although I think already got that bit)
3. Life is a test and a trust. (Which upon close scrutiny, I don't seem to pass very well)

Plus the benfits of having/knowing my purpose:
1. Knowing my purpose gives meaning to my life.
2. It simplifies my life.
3. Motivates it.
3. Prepares me for the bigger things to come.

"Though you may not think you're ready, but God will make you. God doesn't call the prepared, he prepares those He calls."

So much has been said about this thing for the past 3-4 days. Yet, I'm still testing out the waters, is it too cold, or too deep. Minimum distance is covered each day, yet each day, I want more. Fear is a VERY annoying thing. I'm still trying to close my eyes and just jump. Let whatever comes, come. I already know the sea is deep, so it's kind of strange how I'm like, taking it inch by inch, foot by foot, like I'm convinced I'll hit a rock and drown or something. I still need to think somemore. I need someone to kick me off the shore. Cos' then, there'll be no turning back once you're in. But I guess there still needs to be a trade-off around. He can't very well prepare me if I don't let go and take the plunge. I predict the long night ahead of me again then.

Time to use more of my secret weapons then. And upgrade them in the process.

Right then. I'm off to attempt to mug for SS so as to avoid impending doom tomorrow. Astalavista (baby)!

“The wind played with my hair at 3:36 PM”

about me

Name: Lim Xiwen
Age: 16
Birthday: 17th April 1993

Proud member of Sec 4 Unity 09'
IGNYTER

wishlist

1. Grow in God
2. Grow taller
3. More time
4. More self-control
5. To learn how to bar
6. Fufil my resolutions
7. Leave a legacy
8. Improve in football

tagboard

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